Changing Patterns

We all have ways of doing things in our life. Over time, they become patterns. For example, my family knows that my morning pattern once I wake up begins with my going to the bathroom, filling up my water glass, if it is not already filled from the night before, then doing my morning spiritual ritual – five things I am grateful, what is inspiring me, what my intention is for the day and taking a few minutes to reflect on the thought for the day. We all have patterns in our life.

Sometimes others become so accustomed to our patterns that out patterns become important to them as well. Some of the patterns in our life have been a part of our life for a long time; others are newly formed.

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Commercials, Wolves, and The Four Agreements.

A week or so ago, I got an email from someone who asked me if I really practiced what I teach. Yes! So I thought I would share one of those moments with you. If you have been around me for any length of time, you know there are a few things I ask or say. One phrase is make it a commercial, not a documentary. Another is which wolf are you feeding? Does this fit with the four agreements? For those of you who are wondering what I am talking about, here is my cheat sheet. The Four Agreements is a book by Don Miguel Ruiz and the agreements in a nutshell are this: 1. be impeccable with your words – do not say anything negative about yourself or others 2. Don't take anything personally. – It’s only about you if you make it about you. 3. Don't make assumptions. – seek clarification and make sure you both understand each other. 4. Always do your best. YOUR best, not what I think is your best, but your best at any moment, knowing your best can change from moment to moment.
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The Queen or King of __________

Recently, I have been listening to some of the people in my life claim some titles in their lives. A few people have claimed to be the queen of procrastination. Another person I know told me he was the king of trifling. I used to say that I was the queen of serious. As I have listened to my friends, colleagues, former congregants, students (past and present), family members, and people I do not even know how I know, I have come to realize that just about everyone has at one point or time in their lives earned the title of the king or queen of repetition. There are some things in my life that I have done for so long that I no longer realize why I do them or why I do them the way I do them. For example, I have specific days of the week that I clean each room in the house. Or I have to sleep on the left side of the bed. Whether I am with someone or not, I have my side of the bed. I can be sleeping in a king size bed by myself, but I always wind up in the same place, in the same position on the bed. I am not even sure how this became a pattern, but it is.
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