When I was a child

Recently someone shared a picture with me on Facebook which said “Remember when we were young and we couldn’t wait to grow up, so we could do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted? How’s that working out for ya?” I could remember those times. However, what I really remember when I was a child I wanted to be something I was not. I wanted to be darker skinned then I am, so I would take show polish and polish myself brown and then my mother would scrub it off of me. I wanted hair that was always curly, not just sometimes curly. My hair changes texture on a daily and sometimes hourly basis. I wanted to have “real” parents like everyone else and not have ever been adopted. I wanted to be tall like everybody else in my family. I was so focused on what others had told me was wrong with me, that I was moving farther and farther away from loving my self.

As a result, I began looking for the love and approval of others. I wanted them to be able to tell me that I was created to be just who I was. I searched for the person who could convince me that I am who I am supposed to be seemed fruitless. It seemed as if no matter who I spoke to, nobody could tell me what I so needed to hear.

Then there was this moment, when I wrote myself this poem because I was so tired of others telling me I was not enough of something or too much of something else, and I had this epiphany that I am perfect just as I am. The Infinite did not create me in a state of lack, but in a state of abundance. I realized that I am who I am. I have my own unique qualities. Everything I am and have is perfect for who I am. The Infinite loves me so much that I was blessed with everything I needed. I have the exact talents, gifts, resources, and personality to life the life I have been given.

I am no longer a child, and to be honest things are amazing for me. Do I have everything I want? Not yet. However, I do have everything that I need. I have love, abundance, wisdom, and have been blessed with everything I need to move through life. 

This morning I was told I was perceived as being so close to the Spirit. Sometimes I feel as if I am. however, I no it is not my time to stay permanently in that amazing light, so I come back to this realm and distribute the love, gifts, talents, and resources in my life.

If I could give a message to any child in the world, it is this. You are perfect just as you are. Walk in the beauty of the uniqueness that is you. You are who you are because it is part of your calling and purpose in this life. Whatever you look like, whomever you love, whatever your body looks like, however you became part of your “family,” know this – you are a unique and precious individual. There is not, never has been, never will be a single individual exactly like you.  That’s what I would say. Yup yup yup.